Most of our emotional wounds are formed during our childhood. We learn to mask the wounds to receive attention and fit in with our family and friends.
Here is a list of some of the things which may have caused emotional wounds for you: –
- Being shouted at, hit, or exposed to violence, you now feel afraid of others anger.
- Being harshly judged frequently, you now feel inadequate.
- Being ridiculed in public, feeling embarrassed, you now feel ashamed of yourself.
- Being smothered or abused, you now feel inferior.
- Being overly controlled, you now allow people to control you.
- Being used for your parent’s needs.
- Trusting a caregiver and being betrayed, now you find it hard to trust.
- Being made to feel guilty, now you struggle to forgive yourself
- Being rejected when you reached out for connection, now you feel people will not like you.
- Being inadequately nurtured and cared for, now feel needy and empty.
- Being taken care of, and then abandoned, now feeling scared of being left again.
- Not being seen and appreciated for who you were.
If any of the above happened to you, you might feel that you are fundamentally flawed or believe you are not loveable or enough.
All these wounds can leave you feeling disconnected from life and possibly experiencing anxiety, anguish, hurt, depression, frustration and more. The more these feelings and traumas are suppressed, the more disconnected from spirit and life we feel.
How do you heal Emotional wounds?
Step one is to feel your emotions. All too often, we bottle things up. At some point, the emotion will get released, and this can be in undesirable ways, where you end up hurting yourself and others. We often turn to drugs, alcohol, binge eating, sex, or other addictions to numb our pain and emotions. Try talking to family and friends about your feelings if you can or find a qualified therapist to help you.
Step two, healing is a process, not something that will happen in one therapy session. You need to feel the emotion and expel the suppressed energy. Find somewhere where you can be alone then. If you are sad, let yourself cry if you are angry, shout and scream into a pillow, letting go of the suppressed energy.
Step three is to accept these feelings and emotions, really feel them as you let them go. Don’t keep any of the suppressed energy inside of you. Our feelings and emotions are from the past. We don’t want them to influence our future enjoyment. Whatever caused our emotional wounds happened, and by facing it, we can help to change our reaction to it, choose to stop letting it control you in the now.
Step four is to forgive all involved. By really forgiving, you will feel freedom from the control these emotional wounds had over you. This can be done by meditation, prayer, writing a letter and burning or tearing it up.
Step five, use Louise Hays’ mirror work to learn from your pain and wounds. What can you discover? Can any of this make me stronger? Keep searching for the lessons it could be showing you perseverance, forgiveness, patience, anything else you can learn from your pain and wounds.
Step six, if you run a constant story of blame in your thoughts. If your self-talk is saying expressions like……… it was my parent’s fault; it was because of such and such teacher etc. Try to find a positive statement, like, I am a self-determined person, and I allow others the same right. I can trust myself completely as my life unfolds to create my own unique story. I am highly creative, intelligent, attractive, energetic, witty, smart, healthy, wealthy, and wise.
Need help with healing your emotional wounds? Contact Rosemary